“It is the Lord Christ you are serving.” Col. 3:24
How can anyone be so arrogant to make the claim that they have served the Lord completely, entirely void of any ulterior motive?
Such is the claim I have never made and will never make as long as I live. How can I tell a lie as blatant as this? This is a statement even the Apostle Paul was very reluctant to make. He once stated: “My conscience is clear, but that does not make me innocent. It is the Lord who judges me.”
I have been trying to keep my desire of self-expression at bay when I write, yet this doesn’t mean that I have been successful at doing it. Certainly there is still a crack in the depth of my heart that easily and sinisterly eludes my detection. I know full well that the act of composing is a form of self-expression and deep inside of me I truly desire to be seen and to be lauded for what I have done. Surely this is nothing but a kind of self-serving.
“It is the Lord Christ you are serving.” This is something I am very afraid to say both to others and to myself. Surely Paul was sincere when he uttered this, but it sounds so much like an ideal rather than a concrete reality.
I have occasionally found myself absorbed and intoxicated by my own preaching during a worship service, as if I had actually stepped outside myself and become my own admirer. In the name of serving the Lord, I am in essence attempting to serve myself and my own interest.
This is indeed rather a depressing thought. What can I do to save me from myself? I ask.
Trying to serve the Lord with the purest of hearts and entirely uncontaminated motives is a clear manifestation of one’s arrogance, for something such as this is impossible to achieve. The only thing we can do is to avoid paying too much attention to ourselves when we serve the Lord in all things we do, either within or without the church. Too much self-examination and evaluation is never a good thing, for the act of self-judging isn’t God’s mandate. Rather, it’s from the evil one, if it’s anything, for any thinking that results in self-condemnation is mostly from Satan himself. We ought to realize repentance and self-condemnation are completely different things: the former is from above and the latter from below. Indeed, we all have fallen short as far as maintaining pure motivation is concerned when we serve the Lord, yet it’s far better to center our attention on the Lord and not to constantly focus our interest on who we are and what we do. The essence of our spiritual service should always be defined by the Lord, not by how we are motivated to render it.
What I need to repent of more than anything else has always been too much self-examination and self-explanation and, to a lesser degree, too much self-condemnation
Monday, November 12, 2018 8:06:00 AM